Why “Reframing” Can Be Dangerous

I recently posted a quote on Instagram, and a good friend commented, “👏 The power of reframing reality.” 💬

That comment really got me thinking. For most of my life, I’ve been a huge fan of reframing—taking negative (non-constructive) thoughts and flipping them into positive (growth-oriented) ones. 🌈✨

Like many others, I believed that swallowing positivity was the best way to deal with negative thoughts, feelings, and emotions. 🙃 But in the past year, I’ve experienced a new way of living that has healed and empowered me in ways I’d never thought possible.

#wokeAF #buddha 😇

Why Reframing Can Be Harmful 🚩

Reframing might work in the short term, but it can be damaging in the long term.
“Wait… What? Shouldn’t all positive thoughts be good and healthy?”

The answer is: No. A big NO! 🙅‍♂️

Are All Positive Thoughts Good? 🤔

Too often, we’re told by self-help gurus, mainstream media, and even our inner “rational” parts that negative thoughts are bad. 😟

• “Negative thoughts should be avoided.”
• “Turn them into something positive!”
• “Look on the bright side!”

So, what do we do?

• We reframe: taking the microphone 🎤 away from the part that’s hurt, sad, or angry and handing it to the part that’s “positive” and “rational.”

This reframing can temporarily make us feel better. But what happens to the negative thoughts we suppress? 🤔

Negative Thoughts Don’t Disappear 🙈

That’s right—negative thoughts don’t go anywhere. They stay right where they are, quietly growing in sadness, frustration, anger, and pain. 🌀

If you’re like me (or the other 99.99% of people 🙃), you won’t even notice their suppressed presence. Instead, you’ll experience symptoms that point to those unresolved emotions.

Common Symptoms of Suppressed Negativity

Here are some signs you might notice:

1. Slowed Down 🐢

   • Feeling demotivated.
   • Getting easily distracted.
   • Making plans but struggling to achieve them.
2. Feeling demotivated.
3. Getting easily distracted.
4. Making plans but struggling to achieve them.

5. Irritation 😡

   • Complaining about daily frustrations.
   • Feeling bitter or regularly annoyed.
6. Complaining about daily frustrations.
7. Feeling bitter or regularly annoyed.

8. Unknown Sadness 🌧️

   • Sudden waves of sadness with no apparent reason.
9. Sudden waves of sadness with no apparent reason.

10. Not Doing Enough 😔

    • Feeling like you haven’t been productive or accomplished enough.
11. Feeling like you haven’t been productive or accomplished enough.

12. Explosions 💥

    • Emotional breakdowns.
    • Physical pain or illness.
    • Panic attacks.
13. Emotional breakdowns.
14. Physical pain or illness.
15. Panic attacks.

The Role of Distractions 🛑📱

If none of these sound familiar, don’t worry—you’re not alone.
Most of us are double black belt masters 🥋 in numbing and distracting ourselves:

• Netflix binges. 🎥
• Endless Instagram scrolling. 📲
• Keeping “busy” by overworking ourselves. 🏢

Distractions help us ignore the warning signs. But when the distractions stop, even for a moment, those negative symptoms start to peek through.

Rationalization: A Temporary Fix

Even when we notice the symptoms, we often explain them away with rationalization. 🧐 For example:

• “I’m just tired from work.”
• “It’s the weather.”
• “I had a rough week.”

While these reasons might offer temporary relief, they dismiss the deeper issues at play. Ignoring the root problem means it will resurface—often with greater intensity or in a new form.

The Inevitable Backfire 💣

The cycle of suppressing, distracting, and rationalizing negative thoughts continues until…

The inevitable happens.

• Breakdown.
• Burnout.
• Emotional overwhelm. 😵‍💫

In Conclusion: Why Forcing Positivity Backfires

Forcing positivity down our throats is not the solution. It might feel good in the moment, but it’ll backfire in ways we can’t predict or understand. 🚫✨

So, What’s the Solution? 🤷‍♀️

What should we do with our nonconstructive thoughts? Should we binge-eat an entire gallon of ice cream 🍦 or watch every season of Ozark the next time negativity strikes?

Good questions! (I’ll write more on this in a separate article.)

For now:

• Try to listen to the thoughts you label as negative. 👂
• Hear everything they want to tell you. 💬
• You don’t have to act on them (e.g., binge-watching Netflix 📺).
• Listen with curiosity and calmness, and you’ll be surprised by what happens next. 🌟